Demi Moore announced her split from Ashton Kutcher yesterday, in the late afternoon. What does this mean? Does a Thursday announcement mean that Demi wants maximum exposure, and she wants her divorce to dominate the headlines for the next week? I don’t know – I think if you’re going to announce something for maximum effect these days, you should just do it on Monday morning, because then you’re guaranteed coverage the whole week. Anyway, there are lots of stories about the split already, and it hasn’t even been 24 hours. Us Weekly has an exclusive with a “source” who says that Demi was “optimistic” about moving forward. The source says: “She said [she] was going to change for the better… And [she said] that it was time for her to focus on herself again and her girls. He has his thing [but she said she] wanted to focus on her.” Convoluted quote.
Next up, some excerpts from this week’s Star Magazine story, which Radar is now excerpting, and which CB already talked about briefly yesterday:
Ashton Kutcher’s cheating on his wife was the straw that broke the camel’s back but it was the “open marriage” they had that was the downfall in their marriage.
Demi Moore, 49, is filing for divorce from her 33-year-old husband after his latest affair became public, and Star magazine has exclusively learned that her secret life with Ashton and their “open marriage” has been much more twisted than anyone imagined.
“Everyone in Hollywood knows about their arrangement, but they’ve managed to keep it a secret from the general public,” an insider said about the A-list couple.
“Demi is attracted to women just as much as men, so she didn’t always get all she needed from Ashton.”
Apparently they were happy with the arrangement they had for a while. “She was cool with Ashton having flirtatious relationships too. Somehow they made it work all these years. Both of them were respectful of each other,” the source said. “It was a lot of fun for them.”
But it all changed when Ashton’s affairs became public, first in 2010 when Star exclusively reported that he had a fling with 21-year-old Brittney Jones and then his one night stand with Sara Leal on his sixth wedding anniversary.
So Demi finally decided to take matters into her own hands and end the marriage, announcing Thursday that she was going to divorce her philandering husband.
“It is with great sadness and a heavy heart that I have decided to end my six-year marriage to Ashton. As a woman, a mother and a wife there are certain values and vows that I hold sacred, and it is in this spirit that I have chosen to move forward with my life,” Demi said.
[From Radar]
Star’s print issue goes on to say that part of Demi and Ashton’s open marriage deal was that they both engage in “flirtations” with some discretion and mutual respect, but that Ashton began having more and more public affairs, and Demi felt like he was “hooking up with all of these young women behind her back and that wasn’t part of their deal.” As for why Demi waited so long to file, sources claim that Demi’s sense of self has just been battered mercilessly during her marriage to Ashton, and she’s extremely insecure right now. As for Demi and her alleged hookups or “flirtations” with other women – God knows. It wouldn’t surprise me, but who knows?
Speaking of Ashton’s other ladies, though, that chick that he banged last year on his wife’s couch, Brittney Jones, told TMZ that she felt vindicated now:
“Although divorce is often sad I do feel somewhat vindicated. For so long people have thought that I was dishonest or just making up my passionate nights with Ashton, when in fact I was being used. Ashton told me that both he and Demi had an ‘open relationship’ and that he was not in fact cheating. Now I can tell all the facts about how Ashton really was, and hopefully people will believe my side of the story. I feel for Demi very much and wish her nothing but the best during this hard time.”
[Via TMZ]
Yeah, I always believed that something happened with Brittany and Ashton. Her story had so many specifics, and Ashton and Demi’s reactions to the story were so guilt-ridden. Ridiculous. Ashton hasn’t wanted to be married to Demi for a very long time.
Photos courtesy of WENN.
Those arms are scary
Threesomes.
Do people in the real world have these kinds of relationships too? I mean, we hear so much about how couples in hollywood have these weird relationships…open marriages, threesomes, and so on. Do people outside of hollywood have these too and we just don’t hear about them?
or am I just too oldschool at the tender age of 24 to believe that other people live their lives like this?
Even if you have an “open” marriage…
When your hubby hooks up with someone on your ANNIVERSARY…
And when your hubby tweet support for a person who covered up for an “alleged” (cough, cough…) pedo, when one of your causes is the sex trafficking of children…
It’s pretty much OVA!
Demi should never get too close to open flames – all those fillers, silicone, and fake hair could easily go up in flames. Wicked Witch, “I’m melting!”
Guess he might have violated the “don’t embarrass me” part of the agreement.
Well, Ashton sure did.
Nobody forced him to marry her.
LOL. I like how Demi’s dress in the first pix has tissues/napkins left all over it, while Kutcher is bundled up. Brrrr!
Also it couldn’t been that open of a marriage if her weight plummeted. You go through all those changes in staying young for or b/c a younger hubby and you still get screwed in the end.
Her words, “as a woman, a mother and a wife there are certain values and vows that I hold sacred…” will bring on a lot of eye-rolling.Values and vows?! Why is she concerned now, after selling her so long ago by agreeing to an open marriage. It is no wonder, why her self-image is damaged. Ladies full themselves into thinking liberated sex is cool, yet there are few women who are left undamaged by this destructive thinking, as they look back, later on.
She looks scarey in those pictures – her arms are horrible.
Open marriage – well this was a big deal back in the 1970’s – am surprised that hollywood peeps still try it as it was a big flop in the 1970’s!! It really is never a good idea as the human ego really can’t take the type of emotional beating that this type of arrangement entails.
threesomes are fine as long as BOTH partners are in agreement to NOT do anything without the other present..or at least thats how i see it. As soon as one goes rogue…its disaster
I’m pretty sure if you agree to an open relationship rule number one is KEEP IT SAFE!! and Ashton didn’t wrap it up with either of his delightful ladies.
Maybe initially she thought the promise of an open relationship would snag him, but I agree with @Madpoe – your weight doesn’t plummet during a break-up unless you’re genuinely hurt.
Most tabs go into print on Monday, do if you announce then, you run the risk of not making it onto the cover of the print edition.
Demi has been a on the cutting edge of many societal changes regarding women. Remember the movie she did where she sexually harassed Michael Douglas? And also GI Jane? She (and Linda Hamilton) was one of the first female stars to become truly “ripped”. And she virtually kicked off the “cougar” trend of late with her marriage to Ashton. Her “kids first” relationship with Bruce Willis has also always struck me as groundbreaking.
Demi is a very progressive woman, and I can conceive of her conceding to the practicality of dalliances/flirtations within the context of a Hollywood marriage. Kutcher’s behavior clearly crossed a line, and that line is one of respect. He was throwing this in her face and acting liek the douche that he is. If she was having affairs we haven’t heard a thing about them, have we?
I disagree that Demi had this coming or is complicit. Her physical appearance is evidence enough of the betrayal.
She and Bruce Willis were also reported to have an open marriage. So I don’t doubt that it’s true. No one forced her to marry Ashton Kutcher, no one forces her to do anything. It’s time for Demi to embrace her age and move on to someone closer in age. I have yet to know anyone who had an open marriage NOT get divorced in the end and I have known a few! It just never works.
This b*tch (Brittany)
Why the hell do you feel vindicated, you were a star f*cker and made money of blabbing it to the whole world.
You knew he was married, the only reason you cared was because it upped your fee.
Who used who?
Ewwwww. What in the name of fresh hell is the point of being in an open marriage? A tax benefit, what? Can you imagine having your “husband” come home and questioning him as to whether he rubber’d up and did he get a Dr.’s note that his partner was cootie free? Both of them are egotistical fools.
She is stupid. She should have kept a steady side-piece of her own. Everyone knows there is no such thing as an open marriage. Yes, its open to anyone as long as the other person knows about it but if you are not going to be monogamous then be prepared to get your heart broken. Love is not tangible and can be easily passed around sort of like STDs.
Threesomes, wife-swapping, it all happens in good old suburban America (and of course other places too). People, even regular folk who aren’t in the limelight are kinky. Problem with these Hollywood folk though is their kinks get them in the news, often when it is all falling apart. Demi might be progressive, liberal and all the rest of it but the probability is that she kept up with this lifestyle simply because her husband was an overgrown kid. The age difference plays out in more ways than one and I guess she didn’t count on that. Too bad, another divorce to chalk up to her name.
Gristle.
That Ashton is bundled up in a coat and scarf next to Demi who is practically nekkid is ridiculous!
What climate are they in, or is Demi just that smokin hot she doesn’t need a wrap?
Embee- your EXACTLY right…she is that type of woman, and that’s exactly why she will be okay in the long-run….he did cheat, no condom, just not caring and childish dangerous behavior…geez.
well said.
Demi was an attention seeker from waaay back-VF covers, parties, paps etc. Unfortuately, her box office didn’t support the hype. Over the time she was with this immature jerk, I was reminded of the same try-hard desperation. I wonder if the break was the result of another bimbo about to crawl out of the woodwork?
How in Hell do you agree to an “open marriage” and then bitch and moan about your “15 years younger than you” husband cheating on you? WTF? You know that your both famous and are pretty much giving your husband the green light to bang anyone he wants behind your back, as long as what? he agrees to wear protection and oh, maybe the person he’s banging will agree to keep their trap shut about banging your famous husband as well? Seriously?! Hypocrite much?
Am I the only one that finds this story way over played?
A former B list movie actress and a current B list TV actor split? Yawn.
Why get married if you want an “open” relationship? Why not just be committed to one another and live your “other life” on the DL? And whether they had an “open marriage” or not, Ashton STILL violated their agreement to be discreet!
(So does this mean they are legally married?)
Ashton is such a douche-knocker. And one need only look at Demi to see she’s insecure. No “source” quote necessary.
Call me uptight but why the hell do people get married when they still wanna f*ck around with others.
I totally understand open relationships but open marriages? NO! JUST NO!!!
I’m sure that the majority of Hollywood marriages are open. There’s simply too much temptation for most people to stay faithful, so it makes sense to have some sort of understanding in place.
However, I do believe that the agreement would’ve been to be safe and discreet, and Ashton was neither so Demi decided to end the relationship.
I’m glad Demi finally kicked him to the curb!
“Somehow they made it work all these years”. . . uh, right.
In those pics, Ashton looks super smug while Demi looks like a deer caught in headlights.
If he’s wanted out of the marriage for a very long time why didn’t he do it?
Two people in love with themselves taking their pick of young women together. How Sweet.
In Hollywood open marriages are completely normal and I beleive the wives like Demi are more than happy to look the other way as long the affairs don’t become public and the whole world finds out their dirty little secret leading to shame and embarrassment, it’s only then that women like Demi file for divorce.
I agree with bloggers #25 – #33. Open marriage, well you reap what you sow. In end they will be both fine and move on. End of this story.
What Dawn said. It ain’t ever going to work. Just ain’t.
lol @ mamakowalska. exactly.
Brittney Jones – Nobody gives a sh*t about “your side of the story.” We have all forgotten about you, just like Ashton has. Stop acting like you had a “passionate” affair. You f*cked a celebrity, that doesn’t make YOU a celebrity!
“Open Marriage” for them meant 3-somes with a younger chick, with Demi choosing the other woman. Ashton wasn’t supposed to have side-action without his wife.
re: they had an “open marriage”, i call this as spin from Camp Demi. they don’t like the image that she, at 49, may have had a hot young hubby stepping out on her. so this BS about an open marriage and her being into girls is to re-affirm that she-is-oh-so-sexy and how-dare-we-doubt-Ashton-is-no-longer-attracted-to-her, given she can love it up with men AND women. she is THAT desireable. and THAT (sexually) in demand. …give me a break.
PS why Ashton may have claimed to his hookup he had an open marriage — duh. he is trying to bed a girl. he is lying to make the situation more palatable to her. IE, don’t feel badly to let me put my captain in your cockpit. my old lady lets me do that ALL the time.
@Franny – ‘normal’ people have open relationships too, but I don’t think it’s common. The only people I’ve personally known that were in open relationships were very artistic or bohemian folks. However, I’ve never personally known any married couples with an open relationship. I get it, though.
Why would they divorce if it was in fact an open marriage?
^^Because I’m sure the agreement was for them to DISCREETLY have other partners but Ashton’s mistresses have been going public (e.g. the cover of US Weekly this last girl did) about their hookups thus embarrasing Demi.
Most people in Hollywood are bisexual (or at the very least when it’s convenient for them or their careers) so it wouldn’t surprise me at all if Demi participates in 3somes.
I don’t think an open marriage is what people in Hollywood set out to do. I think what happens is that one person is famous, while the other is not famous or has a declining career, and that person just puts up with the offending spouse to keep up their lifestyle until they can’t take it anymore.
So what it all means is she married Asthon, told him she is really into women, so she’s a lesbian? Why marry a man if you want a woman in your bed. She sounds like a fruite cake.
SHE ended the marriage?
Delusion.
“If he’s wanted out of the marriage for a very long time why didn’t he do it?”
lots of guys are like this when they want out of a relationship but don’t have the balls to pull the plug themselves. they just act like a douche until their girlfriend/wife dumps them because they can’t stand it anymore. or if they don’t dump the guy because they’re so messed up from being with him (trying to please him for years on end, losing a sense of self, no self esteem), they dump you in a really terrible way instead of acting like a mature adult.
demi’s WAY too thin.
i think these guys were the subject of a blind item a couple or a few weeks ago. I think they did have an open marriage but the agreement was discreet and no embarrassment and use protection. Ashton, being the d-bag that he is imo, violated that because he wanted out anyway. i mean, even if they did have an open marriage, the way he handled everything didn’t seem respectful of a partner that he supposely loved. i mean, no protection? bad, bad, news. she’s better off without him.
Open marriage is a recipe for disaster. Maybe that’s why some celebs don’t marry. They figure it would just be too hypocritical for even them.
I do get why some people would do it. Say your husband is on tour a lot or you are on location a lot. But I just don’t see how it won’t end in tears.
The no protection thing is just awful. He could have given her anything and he could have ended up fathering an unwanted baby. Dumbass.
@26
I think the tabloids have beaten to death certain stories about “certain” celebrities. that now they have an actual break up with actual cheating. They want so bad for this to be huge. For people to want more and more information. I don’t think people really care. They may post a comment or 2 or 3 or more but I don’t think they are buying the tabloids that are carrying this story. Demi has not had a big career in a long time. Ashton is Ashton and other than twitter and his commercials meh.
Just like with Marc and Jennifer. the drama over their break up lasted what a minute. The tabloid buying public rather buy LIES about “certain” celebrities then the truth about others. Once the divorce is filed and the marriage is over this will be another story that fades away. These stories of OPEN marriages have been thrown on other celebrities too. NO proof just lies that a certain audiences wants and needs to believe.
and I don’t feel sorry for Demi. She has portrayed herself as this super strong, independent woman. If you have seen any of her interviews promoting her earlier films.. you would think she saw herself as superwoman. YET she stays in this relationship. Remember when that first woman said he cheated with her..no protection… and she made a big point of being seen with him. Tweeting pics of herself all over the place. Going on talk shows regarding trafficking of women, standing by him when he screamed he would sue.
then the next woman come out and nothing. Quiet.. silence…
Yeah she is a strong woman. She should have left after the first or at least separate and not stand by him while he lies lies and lies
@ franny, @ Lairen, @ Cerulean: there are a number of ‘lifestyles’ or relationship options out there: quite common, actually.
Polyamory-multiple love relationships w/focus on openness, trust, and a variety of configurations (all sexualities/genders practice this style).
The emphasis is on being honest, not ‘cheating’, though it happens cuz we’re all a buncha monkeys!, and emotional safety as a priority.
It can work-I’ve been a relationship coach with my hubby to poly&monogamous partners for about five years.
Seattle, where I live now, has a huge & diverse poly community. So does Vancouver BC, where we are planning to move when the paperwork gets sorted out. I met my hubby at a poly-centric party almost 14 years ago in the Bay Area. And many other cities around the globe have groups forming & growing in number daily.
The outward public face is tiny compared to all who ‘practice’ this relationship model. Many do it but don’t know the name-the Internet has given us a way to find each other, but if you don’t know the word for what you’re doing, how can you find others who are practcing the same model?
A new book: ‘Sex at Dawn’ gives an illuminating history of human sexuality.
Monogamy is actually a very recent invention, and just like ‘marriage’ and ‘true love’, are a meme that has kinda taken over in a viral way, to the point where people are simply unaware (especially in this country) that there are any other options. Sad but true.
Other relationship choices abound: kinky (BDSM), and swinging. Not to mention the tabloid bugaboos like the Mormon/Muslim many wife plans, and numerous African and multicultural options where the women are dominant.
This country is woefully isolated, poorly educated on cultural, religious, and ethnic differences. Is it any wonder y’all are just shocked!?
I am not saying polyamory or kink or swinging is right for anyone or everyone. It’s sooo not!
I think of it as a gender/sexuality identity continuum similar to a gay/lesbian:masculine/feminine continuum.
Some of us KNOW what we are from early on (I knew after reading the Harrad Experiment at age 14 but didn’t find a community until I was in my late 30s), and some struggle with the feeling that they are freaks until they discover that others exist (my husband, raised a Mennonite, did not discover his kindred until in his 30s).
Some take to it like ducks to water while others do drama and lie and act like predators. Like I said, we’re all a buncha monkeys :).
That all said, I think a couple things happened with AK & DM (I’ve said this in another post). I think DM has some serious issues & hasn’t dealt well with them. She seems body-obsessed to a major degree, and has famously struggled with drugs/alcohol.
I think AK really loved DM, tried valiantly to stay in relationship with her, but just stopped caring at some point. Too young, too douchey, too much drama .
I think he tried to extricate himself by ‘cheating’, giving her a reason and an OUT. That he failed to use a condom is truly amazing to me-I know he’s a dumbass & a douche, but doing something THAT stupid just blows me away.
I think THAT was the straw that broke her will to hang onto him-his blatant disrespect. Now, if what we recently read is true, and she slept with a friend of his, as retaliation or to rub his nose in it, what I see is tit-for-tat, and something DEFINITELY went down that we won’t hear about. I am willing to withhold my judgement as to whose ‘fault’ it is and just declare a system fail/game over, relationship ran its course between two less-intelligent-than-we-thought/knew/hoped-they-would-be silly monkeys.
And who cares ANYWAY? It’s their life, not ours! They can live & die by whatever rules they desire. Last I checked, this is AMERICA!
When you are in ANY relationship, there are usually rules & agreements for emotional & physical safety.
Without a deep level of trust, marriages cannot typically survive the breaking of those rules-whatever they are!
Mine survive some trust breaks, but that’s because a couple of particular circumstances occurred, and behavior IMMEDIATELY changed after IMMEDIATE disclosure. Trust is essential. Took a lot of work, and we are not completely out of the woods, but this relationship model doesn’t work well for liars, cowards, or emotionally fragile individuals…
After reading a bunch of articles about their shenanigans-from MY perspective-I think AK just got done with DM’s inner turmoil, and he did the douchiest thing possible, and HE KNEW there was NO EXCUSE for cheating in public, without protection & she therefore HAD to quit the marriage.
I also think her massive weight loss may be due to the stress of dealing with the implications of the unprotected sex.
When I got involved with a sociopath (LONG STUPID but educational saga) and we had unprotected sex (ONCE!), it was the WORST six months of my life while I waited on tests, after I woke up from the daze I’d been in (he was real good at mesmerizing some women) & realized the potential danger to me resulting from what I now know was his deliberate act of malice towards me. I should have known better. I KNEW better. What he had was an ability to drug me without any substances but his energy field. He was REALLY GOOD AT IT and I met others he victimized. Very scary!
I can see DM having a meltdown when she realized the level of risk he put herself (AND HIMSELF!) at/in/through, whatever the right word is. Not to mention the public humiliation. Can you imagine? No way he was ‘accidentally’ caught. NO WAY!
Her statement, therefore, was probably valid from HER perspective. She does have values. And he violated her trust. Whether he was forced to do this to get out of his relationship, I dunno. Maybe.
As a semi-mainstream but semi-hidden, more-common-than-you-know, alterna chick, I see some context that makes this whole drama a lot more comprehensible, even if it AIN’T familiar or appealing to you. Hey, it’s America!
As my mother would say, “Discretion is the better part of valor” (she would be 86 now). It’s one thing to have affairs discretely, IF mutually agreed; it’s a whole other thing to have an practically public fling with an airheaded San Diego tramp.
I think of SD tramp as Ashton Kutcher’s Moinca Lewinsky. I am sure that Hillary has looked the other way for years, but I bet Bill had a new one ripped with the whole Lewisky scandal. Everyone in the Clinton camp was saying, “What was he thinking?” Me, too. There was Gennifer Flowers, who wasn’t stupid like Monica, but definitely a famewhore and fortunately ignored by everyone but “Penthouse” readers.
@midnightmoon – I agree. Open relationships, or threeway relationships can and do work. But the only way to make sure it works is trust, setting up boundaries and rules, and respect for those boundaries and rules and for your partner or partners.
I guess that’s why they say….
The Moore, the merrier!
I think Jen34 has it. They believe.
Y’all they believe in the love thang more than the average. Their love stories are supposed to be extra princessy, extra hot, extra hip, extra larger than life but totally fairytale. Not orgy tale when they marry. Not most. But long distance relationships really don’t work too well as we see most sadly with military.
They’re also people who live on fantasy and emotions so they’re more childlike and prone to be unable to mature than average. Usually, that’s a problem.
Then two cheaters, known orgy fanatics and one druggie like Melanie Griffith and Antonio Banderas get together and shock the hell out of everyone by making the impossible work.
Go figure, sometimes they do sort of dig deep and make decisions to solve probs and respect and love each other for real.
So…what is the potential impact of all this on their careers? Because Demi Moore was once a pretty powerful actress (St. Elmo’s Fire, Ghost, A Few Good Men). Wonder if she might turn the attention and sympathy into some better roles.
As for Ashton’s career- the only good thing he’s ever been in is Demi Moore.
Those kinds of relationships are always toxic. They eventually crumble and die. How sad. How traffic. How immoral.